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Stranger Within

] 2^nd July, 2005 [

Rain pouring down from the gloomy sky

Storm’s fury getting worse by the minute…

Rain drops hitting my windowpane..

Like it is alive.. n telling me,

“Hey You! Open up! Don’t u kno me? I am RaiN!”

Only if it knew..

I even don’t kno what is “ME?”

Wuts my purpose,

N wut am I.. to be..?

Lightning.. runnin across the clouds

How much I yearn.. Ppl wud notice me like him oneday

For I stand feelin lonely.. Goalless.. Even among in crowds

After spending all those years of my life..

All those infinite depths of time..

I confront myself today.. n my soul cries out,

I’ve let it all go in vain..

How cud I’ve done such a thing?

Wut was I thinking? Was I insane!!

But now wen I’ve regained myself

It’s too late to change anything..

Coz my ignorance has pushed my life to the edge..

To the verge of no return..

A Stranger Within..

..Is ALL I’ve BeCoMe!

|···^v^v··^··v··· Perception Of My HearT ···^v^v··^··v··|

 ] 31st  May, 2005 [

I don’t love you..

Coz love.. Is just a feelin

A bond between our hearts

One more relation..

Just.. life’s another portion

I don’t just love you..

Wut I feel 4 u is sumthin more prodigious

I feel u in every moment that devolves

N with every breathe.. That my lungs takes..

Whenever I look up at the sky

I find ur face in each cloud I see

In every art that has been created until now.. And ever will be..

I feel u.. Running through my veins

Healing all my sufferings

Taking away all my pains..

Just having u at my side

Feels like sauntering through the Eden..

You r the one..

Who made me a man..

From being a mere craven..

When I hold u in my arms..

N look deep into ur green-oceanic-eyes..

I see a glimpse of the Empyrean..

] 7th June, 2005 [

You might not be in my life today

But you are sumwhere more substancial..

You're in Me.. You are my Soul..

Pulling me closer towards you.. With each passin moments

Closer towards my goal..

Love is sumthin that all of us seeks

But wut only a few of us gets..

So I thank thee.. my Beloved!

Who taught me the surmons of love..

Not just to take.. But to serve..

For this no matter where I am

You'll always be in my heart..

And so always surmise this my Celestial Princess

Even though I hav to stroll through the desert

N embrace the scorching heat

You'll be.. You'll be in Each-of-My-Heart-Beat..

While Im clinging to life in the vast arctic snow

In my mind.. Your name will glow

Like the never stoping current of the sea

N the huge rivers' flow..

I'll always keep thinking of you

No matter where I go..

] 30th May, 2005 [

Sumday we wud be set apart..

Don’t forget me then my Elysian Flower..

Coz we share a bond.. even death cant adjourn

N so I shall return..

To feel you, To see you, To meet u my love

N That’s a promise!

From the Depth-Of-My-Heart!!

In The interim.. Find me.. In wut we used to explore together,

Up in the misty night sky..

Among thousands of glitterin constellationz,

You’ll notice A simple star’s intense glow

Tryin to gleamer beyond its power wth utter zest..

Thats me your adherent.. My oblivion! smilin back at you,

Tryin to sparkle more.. Among the rest..

I’ll writhe trillians of time.. n bear any sufferings God makes me endure

If that will make him concede me.. the gift of Life yet once more..

N thus I shall return to you.

To the one whom I adore..

I’ll revive again.. to catch a whiff of ur aroma

To hear the voice that intoxicates me..

For which my heart yearns like waves crashing by the shore..

In a Moonlit-Night..

Wen therz no sound to be heard 4m near n far

Don’t fall asleep my Love..

Wen breezes blows the hair over ur face

N fragrance of flowerz begin to intoxicate you

Know.. I am cumin to meet you..

Wen a night bird sings out softly n the crickets begin to cheer

Close ur eyes my love.. Know I am near..

N wen a stoical current of wind runs softly over ur chin

Belive! I am There..

] 2nd May, 2005 [

Sumtimes.. I just think…

Wud it make any difference?

If I was not here..

Wud I see anyone cry?

N miss me.. When I am not there??

Sumtimes.. I just wonder…

Why am I here?

Does anybody love me..

Do they even care??

Sumtimes.. I just feel lonely…

All alone n mere..

With no one to turn to..

No one to express my feelings, my fear…

Sumtimes.. I dream of a friend…

Who will guide me,

N lead me to a life of happiness n laughter..

Share my thoughts,

Cheer me up when I am down..

N grab me tight,

B4 I lose myself in darkness any further…

Sumtimes.. I just imagine Love…

Cherishing those moments..

Those memories of her..

Which are gone away 4ever; beyond any notice..

Those moments we had spent together,

Those torn-up memories of vows n promises..

That was once made to each other,

Drifted away with the waves, of the time river…

Sumtimes.. I just get frightened…

Coz being alone is my only fear..

Nevertheless it happens..

Shabby from the passage of time,

Now n again feeling somnolent n deprived,

I stand all alone with no one near…

Sumtimes.. I just loose my grip…

A strong voice arises in my mind,

Telling me to let go..

Don’t think of anything,

Go hide yourself, disappear..

Sumtimes.. I just tell myself…

I don’t need any friends..

I don’t need to face anybody, anything..

Not even my fear..

It doesn’t matter whether I am dead or alive,

I have no one.. to care…

} 2nd May, 2005 {

Wut is pain?

Does it occur when theres sumthin, u cannot gain?

Or is it sumthin that hits u, when ur in vain?

Pain...

It drops in ur life... like mid-summer’s rain!

Pain...

A feeling inside... like bleeding from ur vein.

Pain...

It grabs a hold on u tight... n blurs ur brain!

Pain...

It shows u no lenience... n thrashes u like cane.

Pain...

It makes u cry out! It turns u insane!

When u loose out ur boon... n sadness kicks in...

It derives a feeling from ur heart... like withering within...

Theres no way out... n whinings don’t help...

It’s a state in ur life... when suffering is all there is left...

This one here is supposed to be my third poem.. I've got this huge wallpaper in my room which has "Nature Is The Art Of God" written in one of the corners.. I always used to stare at this writings when i was in my room n had nothin useful to do(even while i was studyin 4 xam.. gee.. is dat useful? beats me!.. lolz).. So one day I wrote couple of lines.. Not intendin 2 write a poem or sumthin.. Just yuhi.. u kno.. Then I lost it.. N forgot where I've written it.. N last week while I was lookin 4 sumthin else found it.. So here it is the long lost amatuerish poem (or wutever it is).. EnJoy!!   

´¤··•··¤` NaTuRe ´¤··•··¤`

Nature..

Is the art of God;

A one word story,

Center, of our joy n glory..

Around her evolves our tale

Story of both female n male..

Her elements keeps our life-train on it’s rail

She arranges our life, just as she does in a peacock’s tail..

We are never far from her, no matter where we are on sail.

She watches us laugh, She watches us cry

She is like the shadow, who never pass us by.

She beholds the beauty given by GoD,

The Almighty.. The One.. The creator of this Universe..

To describe Nature’s beauty isn’t possible for any word,

Not even a poem.. not even a prose!

}{ Tue Mar 29, 2005 11:59:20 am }{

It was a rainy day…

And the  weather was all gloomy n depressing,

It was getting dark even in the midday

Clouds roarin like wild beasts…

Rain drops washin away her tears…

Her eyes half close..

Lips shieverin from the cold wind.

She was standin only a feet away from me…

So close.. yet so far away…

I wanted 2 hold her in my arms,

Give her some warmth in this cold stormy weather,

Tell her, Don’t worry sweetheart..

We are gonna get through this…

Everythin will be fine once again..

But.. Just cudnt say it..

She left…

I stood there in the rain,

Lightnin runnin from cloud 2 cloud over my head..

Sumwhere up in the sky..

But I felt 2 numb 2 feel anything.

I just didn’t care wut was happenin around me..

I was hoping… May b one of the lightnins will loose its way..

And struck me…

It wud hav been less painful that way..

Though I knew that’s not gonna happen,

I was praying with all my heart 4 it.

I wished I cud cry out loudly…

Tell this world how cruel it is..

How painful it is.. just 2 be Me.

To live another day..

Breathe.. Eat.. Sleep.. Smile at people when they pass you by..

To live without one’s love!

With a shattered mind n a heart broken into pieces…

}{ Wed Feb 09, 2005 4:52 pm }{

Read slowly.. Word by word.. N u'll kno wut Ive tried to gather up in this poem... Hope u guys like it... 

Paradise Lost

My peace r gone..
My heart is heavy...
The memories r fading..
Yet still.. theres no bound 4 my cravings..
Im lost..
Among Light n Shadow
And so is my will..
To live.. the day after tomorrow...

Im drowning in forever darkness..
Im not asleep
And im not awake..
Im not dreamin
Yet it seems all fake..
Im feeling weak
Though Im wiry..
Im feeling like the corpse..
That is waitin to be buried…

The days r turnin to dawn
And the dawns r turnin to night
Im loosing it..
Im loosing the count of time..

Im like the Baron who lost all his money..
I feel like the king, deposed 4m his throne..
I’ve no one to love..
And for me theres no one left, to care..
I’ve no one to call.. as my own.

My dreams hav been scattered away
And my heart is broken..
I’ve lost the instinct of life
Thus my Paradise..
...is Lost!!

}{ Wed Sep 22, 2004 4:05 pm }{

Friendship - The first relationship that we have to make for ourselves.. wut is friendship? we all kno the answer.. but will giv in a different and unique way if asked.. Friendship, in my point of view is a promise spoken among the hearts of 2 ppl, its not given by any pledge, it isn't written on any paper, but its a promise that those 2 ppl always treasures and share.. Here is sumthin I wrote to express that promise..


||<<>>||_Friends_Forever_||<<>>||

In laughter and sorrow
Whenever your paths get narrow,
I’ll guide you like your shadow,
I am with you now and will be tomorrow..

Things that you cannot bear
Whether its huge or mere,
Even your nightmares, I’ll share,
When you need me.. I’ll be there!
Cause we are Friends.. Friends forever..

I’ll show you the way, which is right
Like the moon of the darkest night,
I’ll borrow your pains to heal your mind
Give you joy, each way I find,
Keep filling your life with happiness and fun
Until the world stops spinning around the sun!!

I found the first two lines of this poetry in my PC while I was checkin out my docz this morning (27th August, 2004). I had used this verse b4.. In a greeting card I had sent 2 one of my buddyz.
This verse clicked sumthin in my mind n I just kept on typin. As it was rainin lik cats n dogs (lik the 2 main opposition parties of BD more likely 2 say…lolz) in our area it gave me the inspiration of writing this …. N so here it is my latest creation “My Beloved” fresh from the hell’s kitchen...
- The_Devil


My Beloved

I made a wish and it came true
The very moment I met you…

I’m always thinking about you…
How could you not love me?
My love is True!

When I think of you I can’t help myself
I fall in despair for the emptyness in my heart for you…
Can’t you see?
I love you,
I’m crazy over you!!!

In the night you’ll see the light
It’s my heart, burning on fire for the desire of you.

With all my love…
To you, beautiful flower.. I give you my heart, my soul…
Cause you’ve become my life, my goal!

I will sing songs and dance…
If it would make you give me
Another chance!

My world is turning gray…
Come back to me
Answer my pray…
Don’t bereave me
From your love, Plz don’t say...
That you don’t love me
And want me to go away……

}{ Wed Aug 18, 2004 10:25 am }{

Hey folks.......here i am with my poem "De@th_Wish" .........i cooked it up last nite.....actually i got the thought of it when i was cumin home yesterday in a runnin car, seein the cloudy sky i got this feelin i had to express it in rhymes.....don hesitate to share ur feelings abut it.......hope u guys like it, cause it took me almost all nite to assemble


De@th Wish

I RaIsE My HaNd To ToUcH ThE SkY,
I FeEl My HeArT SoAkIn DrY,
No MaTtEr HoW HaRd I TrY
LiFe StIlL PaSsEs Me By…

DeAtH WiLl GrAsP Me, N sOoN I’Ll DiE,
No OnE WiLl MiSs Me No One WiLl CrY…

WoRdS NoT SaId, ThInGs NoT DuN,
“I WaNnA LiV!”, I’Ve MiLeS To RuN…

JuSt OnE MoRe TiMe, I WaNnA SeE ThE RiSiNg SuN,
FoRgIvE Me WoRlD FoR ThE SiNs I’Ve Dun…

I LiVeD LoNeLy, LiKe ThE ShInInG MoOn,
SpArE Me GoD DoN’t TaKe Me, PlZ NoT So SoOn…

I WaNnA LaY On ThE BeAcH, JuSt OnCe MoRe,
N SeE ThE DoLpHiNs PlAy By ThE ShOrE…

I WaNnA HeAr ThE SiLeNcE, UnDeR ThE SeA,
WhErE ThErEs PeAcE, N AlWaYs WiLl Be…

HeAvEn Or HeLl, WhErEvEr GoD SeNdS,
B4 I DiE I WaNnA Be SuRrOuNdEd By FrIeNdS…

So HeLp Me GoD, N LeNd Me SuM TiMe,
To SeE ThE WoRlD N UnDo My CrImEs…

GiVe Me TiMe, To MaKe SuM FrIeNdS,
I DoN CaRe, If ThEn My LiFe EnDs…